Kumquat Smoothies

Héo ne cúthe hire heortan lust says 12/29/2002

WORD OF THE DAY: roorback



The title is Old English. It's the last line of the poem "The Missing", by Philippa Boyens. It's on the The Two Towers soundtrack.



She never watched the morning rising
Too busy with the day's first chores
But oft she would watch the sun's fading
As the cold of night crept across the moors
And in that moment
She felt the loss
Of everything that
Had been missed
So used to feeling the spirit sink
She had not felt her own heart's wish



I love it. There's also one called "The Ents", translated into Sindarin (a form of Elvish, for those who don't know). But this one... It's so pretty. I'm practicing saying the Old English, which is interesting.



I've gone scanner-psycho. There are pictures from semi up. I've also scanned some of the pictures I've drawn, which are lovingly referred to as "Jenna's Bad Art." Here's some of it now!


That's Isbell. She's in my book. She's one of my favourites. :-D



So yeah. Nommuch else. Gotta work tonight, 5-10:30. With Heather and Erin. I haven't seen Erin since Thanksgiving, and that's when she was leaving as I was coming in. She's so nice.



Talking to Chad the other day, he was grilling me on the backstory to my novel. Everything I explained to him was made up on the spot as he asked me. Hehehe.



Um... yeah.



Dude, maybe Heather and I'll make pizza pockets tonight. If it's not busy.



kumquat smoothies all,



<>jenna d.<>




previous entry : These Tears You Cry Have Come Too Late next entry: rithannen i geven, thangen i harn na fennas i dau

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Seven? That is really good, our neighborhood Radio Shack is about a combined two, all of which blonging to my friend's brother. [barrington]

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LOL. Shh... Chad'll never know...
;) [Static Inertia]


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Nothing like fakin' a novel to make ya hungry for pizza pockets. Am I right? Am I right? Huh? Huh? Well, ok, maybe not, but hey, I know you didn't right it, but the poem kicked ass. Just to let you know.

[LadyK]


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That whole thing with the Ents was cetainly amazing. After reading the book, i was worried how they'd pull the thing off. They did good. Seen it only 3 times. Soon i will be getting the soundtrack. Magnificent is it? yeah. i think you're a touch too much into elvish... [MidnitePhantazy]

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Happy New Year!
RYN: At that rate he could help you write an entire novel. :)

PS. Oi Oi Oi to you too. [Static Inertia]


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Ahh, poo on a stick. I will have to wait until I get back to school and have more than dialup to look at your pictures. Gar on slow internet.
I'm sorry your Christmas wasn't great. How was New Year's? I guess I could go read the rest of your entries to find out...now couldn't I? Heh. :D [Ms. Spunky]

These Tears You Cry Have Come Too Late 12/25/2002

WORD OF THE DAY: nativity



Christmas. Lovely in some parts, downright shitty in others. Got the Printer/scanner/copier hooked up and I'm itching to scan MORE stuff but I won't because I'm going to bed soon. Daniel got me The Two Towers soundtrack and I love it. The collector card thingy in it has Gandalf and Éowyn on it. Which is good, because I love both of them. Hell, I love all of them.



I'll write about more stuff later. And show you some scanned stuff too. *grin* Going to Grammy's tomorrow.



Merry Christmas and
kumquat smoothies all,



jenna d.





previous entry : Maybe I'm Just Blind next entry: Héo ne cúthe hire heortan lust says

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i got a dvd player and i can't hook it up yet cause it needs another part. i hate when that happens, man.
-jessie [barrington]


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Yay, you noticed my LOTR references! I didn't think anyone would :) I got Two Towers on DVD for Christmas and everything was tumbling about my mind and little words kept falling out. How cute is 'Elevensies'? [Sarcastic Panda]

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What am I on about, I got The Fellowship on DVD, not Two Towers :P [Sarcastic Panda]

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i have seen that one, it is for radio shack. it is funny as hell. and that is where i went to to get my part to connect darn cheap and new-fangled. [barrington]

Maybe I'm Just Blind 12/22/2002


Sooooo... what else is new?



The Senior Reach packages are actually kinda hard. I'm a little scared but we have a good team of nine. The six from last year are back - me, Katie, Heather, Anita, Éadaoin and Vince - plus Shannon (who is excellent at math), Devin (yes, my ex-boyfriend, who happens to be good at math and science) and Kim (whose specialty I do not know but heck, she makes us laugh). So it's a big team, and we're not all going to fit in Saitz's van. He thinks perhaps we won't all go to all the tournaments, which bugs me. I want all of us to go, all of us to experience it all together. We're a team, for crap's sake. Someone should get their G2 ASAP. Or we should find another driver. Or get a bus, even though it costs money.



Dude, there's nine of us! Just like the Fellowship of the Ring! I'm not obsessed, really...



I saw The Two Towers on opening night and oh God, what a spectacle. Katie, Adam and I went to Subway for dinner since the people at Kelsey's decided to ignore us, then we went to Zellers to kill time and I got my sister and brother their Christmas presents (Scooby Doo toe socks for Andrea and a Toronto Maple Leafs mug and t-shirt set for Daniel), then we went to the theatre about half an hour before the start to get our seats. Then, I was completely awestruck for three straight hours.



It was so good. You don't understand unless you've seen it, it was so great. Helm's Deep was spectacular, Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas fighting ninja-style in Edoras's Golden Hall was just plain kickass, the music was beautiful (downloading some now *grin*), Treebeard and the Ents were amusing (and they kicked ass), the Wargs were THE FREAKIEST THINGS I'VE EVER SEEN, Merry and Pippin were adorable, Gollum was just the coolest thing on the face of the planet, Sam was as sweet as ever, Frodo started to scare me, the Dead Marshes were sooooo creepy, and Gandalf was the best. And that's just the half of it. I'll shut up now, for fear of spoiling it for anyone.



Our school's talent assembly was on Friday. The band Tortion (formerly Insight) were THE best. They had their singer there, and he has such a gorgeously smooth voice and he's fucking hot. Yeah, they're all cute (dunno about Chris though... it's hard to think that way of someone you've known since infancy... and that hair...) but dude... he was... dude! They're playing the Dungeon on January 3, Katie and I are thinking of going.



"A Condiment Christmas", brought to you by Darcy and Kyle, Narration by Matt Lewis, was the most disgusting thing ever. The story goes that Darcy (an elf) was mad that Santa (Kyle) got all the food at the houses and he got nothing. So Santa says that at the next house, Darcy can eat whatever's left out. What Darcy doesn't know (and Santa does) is that the next house is Ms. Foy's (our principal), and she leaves out the worst food. So Santa mixed together a bunch of stuff (including yogourt, marshmallows, table syrup, coffee, honey mustard, powdered mustard, two-month old Renée's Caesar Dressing, cottage cheese, sour cream, chocolate sauce, olives, vinegar, and some stuff I'm probably forgetting) and Darcy had to eat it. Oh God... It stunk to high heaven, mostly because of the vinegar. Darcy looked like he was about to puke on several occasions and I was gagging myself, but I got pictures. *grin* I'm so evil.



Went to Dad's this weekend for pre-Christmas Christmas. Or something like that. Watched movies. The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys was interesting, and scary and then sad at the end. The Gift blew monkey balls, and if I hear Cate Blanchett talking in a Southern accent again, I'll scream. Played Scrabble. I won. Mwahahaha. Afterwards I played around with the tiles and arranged the names of all the members of the Fellowship of the Ring, then a bunch of minor characters, then a bunch of places, and then some important names and items. It was fun.



What? Oh, presents. Yes. I got some candles & holders, a scarf, one of those crazy lightbulbs with the weird thorn-thingies on them, a metal dolphin keychain, and a shirt. And that family gift that Dad had been talking about that required a roll and a half of wrapping paper? Oh yes, yes it was, a dream come true: A beautiful gray Lexmark X83 Printer/Scanner/Copier. We now own a fucking printer/scanner/copier. I am in heaven. Well, limbo. Because it was the last one, the one on display, Dad said, and the idiot at the Radio Shack didn't pack a power cord. So I have it sitting here in my room, all nice and lovely looking, and I am unable to use it. Dad's going back with the receipt to get it and he'll bring it out on Christmas. And then I can scan stuff. Wahoo!!! Helloooo web site updates!!!



Yeah. I gotta work tomorrow, 5-10:30. I hope it's not with Alexis. I can't remember. I really don't want to be there that long with her. Hoping it's Heather. Because I worked with Melissa last week and I remember her saying it wasn't her. AHHHH.



Listening to lovely music from The Two Towers. All must hear, even if they do not like the movie, because the music is excellent. From both movies. Oh dear. I must see The Two Towers again. I must.



kumquat smoothies all



<>jenna d.<>




previous entry : Laughing In The Dark next entry: These Tears You Cry Have Come Too Late

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^ WTF?

Anyway, how do you say the French-looking name that starts with an E that is on Reach? [barrington]


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Damnit! I want to see the Two Towers. I want to see it now. [Static Inertia]

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It was amazing. [lafosta]

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since you deleted that note, it looks like my note hates your entry.

i am irish. my dad's mom's maiden name is o'cleary. [barrington]


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Two Towers was amazing. I was there at midnite, and on Fri, and sunday. i still plan on seeing it yet again. smigel was great, but legolas is my fav... [MidnitePhantazy]

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yeah, i really wanna go see two towers.

anyway, i would love to live in another country like that. especially ireland, how beautiful. [barrington]


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last summer what my big travel summer, i went everywhere, man. except canada, i should go there.
-jessie [barrington]

Laughing In The Dark 12/22/2002


Much has happened. Currently, I am listening to Lostprophets, waiting for Christmas, and amazed to see that the first half of that huge entry I thought I lost got saved. So I shall continue from where I left off.



It was a good party. The only shitty thing was Heather getting sick and then depressed. The second time she went to throw up I went with her and locked the door (to keep the drunk assholes out). She wasn't bringing up much else but saliva, but she sat there resting her head on the toilet seat (good thing it was one of those cushy ones) crying while I rubbed her back, then she told me that she's going to be dead by the time she's twenty.



Alarm bells go off, a little old lady with a shopping cart crosses the street and the vehicle of my mind careens off course and nearly hits a lamp post. It's needless to say those are words one does not like to hear.



Apparently (according to her doctor anyway, whoever that is), Heather's body is starting to turn on itself. I don't know if this is her kidneys (which she's always had problems with) or something else, but either way, she hadn't let on until that moment and it scared the crap out of me. She cried for a while and then kinda pulled herself back together, washed up and we went back to the living room, where Heather proceeded to be fine for a while, and then break down to Katie and I.



She told us a lot. I doubt it's everything, but it certainly was a lot. Her parents expecting her to be perfect, her trying to ensure everyone's happiness, and what seemed to be most of all, the pressure Casey puts on her as he believes she's perfect and depends on her for so much. It just came pouring out, over and over, interspersed with sobs of "Oh God..."



Overall, it seems that in her quest to make everyone happy, Heather has forgotten herself and it's making her sick and sad. Casey puts her up on a pedestal and says that he needs her, says she's the one and probably has half their wedding planned out, but Heather doesn't even know if she loves him that way anymore. She doesn't want to be tied down, she wants to go do things, go meet people, but she doesn't want to break up with Casey because she knows it'll hurt him so much because of the way he depends on her. It's not healthy for either of them. She knows she's too young to have truly found "The One" and that if she and Casey truly are meant for each other, they'll find their way back together. He seems to be too scared to take that risk. It certainly doesn't help that (another revelation of Heather's) they had sex while he was down here last (semi weekend) and afterwards he said he regretted it, but then later said he didn't. After talking to him, and taking all things into consideration, I deduce that he was probably scared it would screw things up, moreso for Heather and their relationship than for him personally. Even so, it made her feel used, and saying that was quite asshole-esque of him.



All Katie and I could do for Heather was hug her and reassure her and tell her that she may hate hurting people, but if in making everyone else happy she's making herself sick, she's going to need to take some steps to feeling truly happy again. Therefore, she needs to stand up to some people and tell them enough's enough, even if it means hurting them. Because everyone gets hurt, and she can't protect them from that all the time.



I got home at one thirty. Later, I wrote the poem/song thing that's in the previous entry.


continued...

Cry To Me 12/22/2002


Cry To Me




You're spiralling somehow
I don't know what from
I've suspected for a while now
From the hints that you've dropped.
There is something more
But you've hidden it from all
It's too much now
Cry to me



Cry to me
Tell me your fears
Cry to me
Recount the years
I will not leave you
I'll hold you through the pain
Somehow you'll get through
Cry to me
Forget the tear stains



I find you reeling
From a punch you threw at yourself
Numbing the pain for a while
But leaving you ill.
I tell you, it's not good for you
It's making everything worse
And it all starts crumbling
Cry to me



Cry to me
Tell me your fears
Cry to me
Recount the years
I will not leave you
I'll hold you through the pain
Somehow you'll get through
Cry to me
Forget the tear stains



It's not fair to you
To be the hero all the time.
To strive for everyone's happiness
And forget yours is wrong.
Everyone gets hurt
You know from your life
So take a deep breath
Cry to me



Cry to me
Tell me your fears
Cry to me
Recount the years
I will not leave you
I'll hold you through the pain
Somehow you'll get through
Cry to me
Forget the tear stains



It's time to be strong for you
And not for another.
If this process pains them
Then know it's their turn.
You know you're too young
For such serious things
And if it falls apart
Cry to me



Cry to me
Tell me your fears
Cry to me
Recount the years
I will not leave you
I'll hold you through the pain
Somehow you'll get through
Cry to me
Forget the tear stains



I can't make you promises
I can't force you into these things
But I can be there when you're angry
When you're sad, when you're sinking
I can be on the other end of the phone
Or a walk down the street
Remember always, you can
Cry to me



Cry to me
Tell me your fears
Cry to me
Recount the years
I will not leave you
I'll hold you through the pain
Somehow you'll get through
Cry to me
Forget the tear stains



Cry to me
Tell me your fears
Cry to me
Recount the years
I will not leave you
I'll hold you through the pain
Somehow you'll get through
Cry to me
Forget the tear stains



--December 15, 2002



Wrote this for a friend of mine who's going through a rough time. To her -- I love you. :-)

Don't Ever Say You're On Your Way Down When... 12/17/2002

WORD OF THE DAY: congeries



Much has come to pass in these last seventeen days, and yet I have not had the will to write it.



Semi formal (December 5) went off without much of a hitch, aside from one guy being turned away because apparently he'd been drinking before. The food was good, decorating went quite well, the DJ kicked ass, and, much to Heather's relief, everyone had a great time. Apparently, some people thought it was better than last year's prom. I have pictures, which, as usual, must wait to be scanned. One day, one day...



December 11 was our school's Christmas dessert concert, in which I played clarinet and sang soprano. We were So. Good. The Pines were... not so good. But, you must factor in a) the incredibly low quality of their instruments and b) the fact that they didn't have a band last year. So it was a good night. Except at the end when we played "Fidgets" we had to stand up and when I did, my camera fell off my stand and the batteries came out. And with my piece of crap digital camera, if power is cut, you lose all your pictures. So no Christmas concert pictures for you.



I took a photo trip on December 12 though, and the pictures are crap. I put them up just so Casey would stop bugging me to update though.



Anita's 16th birthday was yesterday and so on Saturday, the 14th, we threw her a surprise party at her boyfriend Tom's place. It went off so well, despite that everyone Heather was driving was late (I was only by a minute or two, Jamie and Ashley ran to Heather's place, Lauren came a little later, and Darcy and Kyle took twenty fucking minutes). Anita didn't suspect a thing and cried when she came in. For three weeks she'd been thinking Tom was taking her out for a fancy dinner (at a place that doesn't even exist anymore, LOL), even though Heather was planning it and they have all the same classes together. Hehe.



I ate way too much candy and drank way too much pop. Stomachache. They had ice cream cake. Ahhh... Chris, Tom's brother, was insisting that he was close to finishing an entire two-four and wasn't drunk. As I put it, "No, Chris, you're not drunk, you've just had a lot of alcohol and as a result are acting like an idiot." About half the people drank, the other didn't or didn't much. We pulled a mean trick on Chris's friend Sam. Katie had threatened to pour his Mike's down the sink, but didn't, and when he went to the bathroom we his it and filled an empty bottle partway with water. Then when he came out, Katie was like, "Hey Sam!" and poured it down the drain. The look on his face was about as priceless as the one on Anita's when she came in. He then proceeded to chase Tom around the house, then take a detour to the fridge to grab the rest of the box. Funny.


Continued...



previous entry : I Saw The One Ring! next entry: Cry To Me

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Hehe. That guy being turned away for drinking before the dance...that would be a strange occurrence here in college. Funny how your perspectives can change so quickly...
Do you know that in California they say soda instead of pop? I went home for break and said soda and got the weirdest look from my friend. Damn Californication...ew ick ew.

(Hehe.) [Ms. Spunky]


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^ It is soda. [barrington]

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hey kool diary, wot do u fink of mine? Its new ..... [Mentalist_biatch]